The past few
months have held some of the most incredible experiences of my life, and this
crazy adventure isn't even finished yet. I am seeing, smelling, tasting,
touching and hearing beauty in forms that I couldn't before have even imagined
existed. I know that this world is the creation of an infinite God, and I have
been shown a greater glimpse into his character as I’ve seen new parts of it.
But despite this knowledge, I'm amazed by how easily and frequently I've fallen
into the trap of making this about me. I am thankful, and I know I'm here
purely by grace. But I often lose track of the fact that I've been placed in
Spain right now, and on this planet for who knows how long, for a purpose
bigger than I can understand.
Every aspect and twist and turn of our lives is meant for that- not just the highlights that we post on social media or reminisce about when we're having a dull day. God has a purpose and a presence in the pain, and the monotony, and the dark moments of our time here. When we come down from the high points of life and set back into the everyday, or the trials, He doesn't change or become less good and in control. These beautiful things surround us every moment, in tangible and intangible forms, even when we fail to recognize them as his gifts, and they are meant to lead us to a deeper adoration of Him. Even our hurting is a gift, sometimes a greater one-to remind us how utterly unable we are to control our own lives, and that this pain is temporary. That God provided the sacrifice of himself in human form as the greatest gift imaginable. One that allows us to move beyond pain and experience the fullness of his beauty for eternity.
I was just sitting here thinking about my incredible day and everything else I have planned before I go home, and I started to get kind of upset thinking about the stuff that I won't be able to do because I'm running out of time and travel funds. Then I felt a slap in the face. How ignorant am I to forget that He has already written all of the days of my life, and will put me where he wants me? How selfish am I to make this about myself, and to begin to expect or feel entitled to these experiences? I'm not even entitled to my own breath. He didn't place me here so that I could have a fun semester- that aspect is an incredible gift, but it alone has no eternal purpose. All of this is designed to bring glory to Him.
I want to be more able to love God and share his love with the people around me as a result of my experiences. I want my heart to hurt more for people who are hurting, and for that to motivate me to sacrifice more freely. I want to die to myself every day and spend more time thinking and praying about making Him known than for more personal comfort and happiness. My flesh continues to seek temporary, insatiable fulfillment and recognition. But that makes his grace even more real and necessary- I'm thankful to have a savior who redeems me daily, and I know that I won't stop needing that until I leave this life. I pray that my life would bring glory to Him and not to myself.
Every aspect and twist and turn of our lives is meant for that- not just the highlights that we post on social media or reminisce about when we're having a dull day. God has a purpose and a presence in the pain, and the monotony, and the dark moments of our time here. When we come down from the high points of life and set back into the everyday, or the trials, He doesn't change or become less good and in control. These beautiful things surround us every moment, in tangible and intangible forms, even when we fail to recognize them as his gifts, and they are meant to lead us to a deeper adoration of Him. Even our hurting is a gift, sometimes a greater one-to remind us how utterly unable we are to control our own lives, and that this pain is temporary. That God provided the sacrifice of himself in human form as the greatest gift imaginable. One that allows us to move beyond pain and experience the fullness of his beauty for eternity.
I was just sitting here thinking about my incredible day and everything else I have planned before I go home, and I started to get kind of upset thinking about the stuff that I won't be able to do because I'm running out of time and travel funds. Then I felt a slap in the face. How ignorant am I to forget that He has already written all of the days of my life, and will put me where he wants me? How selfish am I to make this about myself, and to begin to expect or feel entitled to these experiences? I'm not even entitled to my own breath. He didn't place me here so that I could have a fun semester- that aspect is an incredible gift, but it alone has no eternal purpose. All of this is designed to bring glory to Him.
I want to be more able to love God and share his love with the people around me as a result of my experiences. I want my heart to hurt more for people who are hurting, and for that to motivate me to sacrifice more freely. I want to die to myself every day and spend more time thinking and praying about making Him known than for more personal comfort and happiness. My flesh continues to seek temporary, insatiable fulfillment and recognition. But that makes his grace even more real and necessary- I'm thankful to have a savior who redeems me daily, and I know that I won't stop needing that until I leave this life. I pray that my life would bring glory to Him and not to myself.
“For this reason I kneel before the Father, from whom every family
in heaven and on earth derives its name. I pray that
out of his glorious riches he
may strengthen you with power through
his Spirit in your inner being, so that Christ
may dwell in your hearts through
faith. And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, may have power, together with all
the Lord’s holy people, to
grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to know
this love that surpasses knowledge—that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God.” –Ephesians
3:14-19
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